Monday, May 17, 2010

there are no mistakes. there's what we do. and what we don't do.

never in my life have i been in a situation to decide between two jobs. "do what's best for you," offered my good friend when i questioned what to chose. i don't know what that means, entirely. what if i make the wrong decision? does that even exist? i am torn between a position at the hotel which will provide status and experience and a dependable income. but at the expense of early and long hours and an inflexible schedule. i can already feel myself dripping with jealousy and resentment as all my friends gather for dinners and concerts and ultimate frisbee...and i am tucked away in mountain village. or i could find myself behind the bar at brown dog. the restaurant that i left this winter. i am forcing them to make a decision as to whether or not they will offer me more than the lowly server's position. a better wage and a four day week makes me want to settle back in at BDP. the flexible schedule and free access to festivals makes this summer sound promising and exciting. but will i feel like a failure. for stepping down the ladder? is that even a valid concern? i came here for community. i came here for adventure. fulfilling demands for omlettes and cappucinos doesn't seem very adventurous.

i need money. but i feel the richest when my heart is satisfied.

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